Barriers

I've resolved to be transparent.

I wouldn't say that I've been secretive, necessarily. But I like to put my best foot forward. 

Sometimes this manifests itself after a flurry of cleaning and working on the classroom, which can leave me exhausted and drained. No matter how I feel, I accept as my responsibility to be upbeat, positive, energetic. 

And I do believe that in that case, the answer is to sweep it under the rug. When it's for the sake of creating a warm and inviting environment for our members and their children, I happily push my needs to the back of my mind. They'll inevitably resurface.

But even though I'm happy to embrace this trait of mine when I believe the situation warrants it, I see the value in being real. In showing who I really am, flaws and all. I believe this is the path to deeper, more authentic relationships. Nobody wants to feel like they are performing, and I definitely don't want to make anyone feel like they need to perform simply because that's what I have been doing.

And - it takes the pressure off me. If I am meeting all of my self-imposed expectations 4 out of 5 days of the week, what happens on that fifth day when I truly can't muster it? I feel like a failure. And in fact, I'm the one that's set myself up for failure.

So, with that in mind, you're going to be seeing some real stuff on this blog. In my quest to be transparent, I may occasionally overstep the line. I may share too much. Forgive me. I'm still learning.